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Tit Bits 12 June 2006

Posted by editor on Jun 12, 2006 - 12:07 AM
Filed under: Articles, Tit Bits

Tit Bits











Mini-skirts, shorts and skimpy tops...


I heard about a visitor to the weekly auction at Swingfield Village Hall was left holding a hot book, in more ways than one. Seems the punter was looking through a box of unsold items at the end of the auction and came across a copy of the
Kama Sutra. Absorbed in flicking through the pages they didn't realise someone had removed the box. The red faced reader is now desperately trying to find the owner after trying to explain away his
acquisition to his wife.

The sun has certainly brought out the mini-skirts,
shorts and skimpy tops, but do we really need to see our parish councillors topless. And not a chain of office to be seen.

And still on the subject of the recent warm spell. It must be getting on for a year now since Shepway Council in all their wisdom introduced the cost cutting fortnightly household waste collections. People told them it wouldn't work in the summer. Well guess what - the contractors failed to come on the designated day last week and sure enough with the bins left out for more than a day, some of the estates began smelling like a landfill site with flies and the inevitable maggots ready to crawl out of the two week old refuse.

Talking of the sun - it may well have been a glorious weekend but not so glorious when it comes to fashion sense. Why is it than whenever we get a hot day, people think they can rummage through their Spanish holiday wardrobe to parade around in some of the most outrageous fashion disasters you would only ever buy if tanked up on San Miguel and Sangria? I must take note of my comments and get rid of those Bermudas, after all I can barely see them now that they no longer fit my waist and end up tucked under my San Miguel belly.

It's hard to understand why so many young tree trunks and branches are
snapped off
. It wasn't like that in my day when every boy had a penknife and we would spend hours whittling away at the bark, signing our names and
carving love hearts and  initials to the girl of our dreams. There was a point then to tree mutilation and very few trees actually died as a result. But
what's the point now of hacking one down, can't people write? Can someone please explain? 











Would you like to contribute to my page of tit bits?


Email titbits@localrags.co.uk


 

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